I haven't been out in public much for the past year, and so I haven't really had a lot of questions to address, however that doesn't mean there is a lack of questions.
I thought that with the start of a new year, and with the birth of my little miracle, it might be a good time to share some of the questions that I asked. The questions that eventually lead me to adopt Mormonism as my own personal faith.
Here is the first-
I was aware at a very young age that relationships required a lot of work to be successful. Just like a living being, if you don't feed and follow and grow a relationship, it will become weak and die. This makes sense, as our relationships are all with other people. This is especially true of marriage.
What I wanted to know was:
Why should I extend myself, put myself in vulnerable places, and give so much of myself to develop a relationship that would end with death?
It was too hard for me, too mush risk, too little reward.
In answer, what I found was the doctrine of eternal marriage and families. We (the Duke and I as well as many other LDS couples) are not married "til death do you part." We are sealed to one another for "time and all eternity." This sealing extends to our children. In return for this opportunity, more is asked of us, but I knew that I would happily give anything to have the blessing of having my marriage and my family exist beyond this lifetime. Occasionally I have been asked if it is difficult to live the seemingly strict tenants of my faith. I easily repeat, I would do anything asked of me by the Holy Being willing to permit my marriage to perpetuate forever.
The second question is the reverse of a question that once or twice I have been asked point blank, but more often only see in people's wondering, but silent, eyes. They want to know- "What if it isn't true?"
For me, the question was the opposite:
What if it is true?How would I feel if I passed into the next life and found out that by living the principles of the gospel that I could have been married to my husband for eternity, that I would have had eternal relationships with my children, that I would have been extended the opportunity to have more children and increase many many times over all the joys of this lifetime.
How great would be my regret if I had passed over that opportunity?
And so what if it isn't true- I believe that it is, and isn't it better that I live my life in this way, hopeful, expecting, working to enrich a family and a marriage that I believe will extend beyond this life. I certainly won't be punished for my beliefs and my chosen way of life.
If there is no possible punishment for my acceptance of this faith, even if there is nothing more than the possibility that I will receive the blessings it promises, that is reason enough to live the way that I do. The risk of loosing those opportunities, those blessings, is too great. The simple possibility of gaining them is enough incentive to live the teachings of Jesus Christ.
