52 Ways to Have Fun without Alcohol. . . a series.
I was going to make it 101 ways, but I wasn't sure if I could do that all on my own. I figured, if I can come up with 52 then you have at least one a week to try out.
So with no further delay
1. Tonight we gathered a few friends (both Mormon and otherwise) and headed to Snohomish, WA to visit Stocker Farm's corn maze. It was great fun. Under what other circumstances are adults permitted to run around in the dark, chasing after one another, and not have the cops called on them? We first found our way thorough the maze together as a group, then we decided that a game was in order.
Each of us ran alone into the maze (and we are talking about several acres of corn,) in two minute intervals. We ran walked or jogged through the maze looking for one another. We weren't allowed to exit the maze until we were all in a group again. It took us about 40 min or so to all find one another. When we did, we then decided to race to the end. Women vs. Men. The men won, as Tzarina and I stopped to try to decide if we should stay in the maze and let the men worry about what happened to us, or if we were done and ready for something to warm us up. The call of Apple Cider was stronger than our desire to scare our male counterparts, and we met up with them soon after.
We moved our party to a little known coffee shop called Starbucks, enjoyed some caramel apple cider and hot chocolate, and engaged in stimulating conversation, something often missing from alcoholcentric get togethers.
A very enjoyable evening.
Sunday, October 29, 2006
Saturday, October 21, 2006
So Manic Hispanic gets the prize for asking it first. . . because I know there were others who wanted to.
Like all good myths, this one has its origins in truth, and so we must begin at the beginning.
So lets start out with a mini discusion of the word "sacred." Can anyone give me a defenition? Anyone? Yes, you in the wings and halo, thank you.
According to dictionary.com:
Yes, thank you, a very complete answer.
Now, I know what you are thinking, "Hello, Duchess, we know what the word sacred means, we are mostly college educated and aren't totally illerterate." I know, I know. I just wanted to be clear. I'm sure all of you also know that our society basically doesn't understand the concept of sacred, even if they can define it. Evidenced by the common question "Is nothing sacred anymore?"
And my answer, well yes, but only to those individuals who hold things sacred, and therefore, if you hold something sacred, you would be smart, and entirly appropriate to keep that thing protected and keep it within the sphere of others who also hold it sacred. Perhaps you may have read or heard the Biblical term for this, we are told to not "cast our pearls before swine." Now it's pretty clear why you wouldn't take a beautiful strand of pearls and throw them into a pig pen. It's not that there is anything wrong with the pig, it's just doing what pigs do. It wallows in mud, eats, sleeps, lives a good pigs life, but it wouldn't appreciate the pearls, and while it might find them momentarily interesting, it would not know what to do with them or how to care for them.
OK, so now that we know all about pearls and pigs, lets talk a little about LDS temples. If you live in the US you have likely seen an LDS temple. They are stunning and magnificent buildings with luxourious grounds. There is one here in Bellevue, if you haven't seen it, take a drive over, it's a beautiful building and the Duke's dad helped to build it when he was a baby.
You may have also seen our somewhat plain chapels, where we go to church on Sundays. We don't attend the temple on Sundays, they are open Tues-Sat, generally. So what do we do in the temples?
The temples are of the greatest importance to our religion. Inside of them is where we participate in ceremonies, (simple in nature, no puppies, no chickens, no wierdness) to seal our families together for eternity. For instance, the Duke and I were married in the Salt Lake City temple, but the ceremony contains no reference to "death do you part." Instead, you covenant with one another to form a marriage, a bond, a family that will last through eternity. We believe that families can remain intact in the following life, if certain criteria are met. In addition to sealing ceremonies we learn what those criteria are and how we are to meet them, then we make promices both to our families and to God that we will do those things. So the main thing that we do in the temples is learning.
We don't talk a lot about what we do in the temple because it is so sacred to us, as it deals with both our God and our families. It is also one of those experiences that you can't really understand until you've done it yourself, you know, like bungee jumping, so it's really pointless to talk about it with people who haven't experienced it.
So, that's all well and good, but we aren't able to go to the temple everyday, and usually not even once a week. There is not perscribed number of times you should go, but once a month is common. So, in the meantime, how do we remember the promices that we have made to God and to our spouces (and children.)
Humans have an uncanny ability to forget really important things. If this wasn't so, no husband would ever forget his anniversary. Some other case-in-points: people often forget, in the day to day grind, why they originally fell in love with thier partner. People forget to thank one another for all sorts of things. People forget how much they love their children.
And so, I finally get to the answer to the question. Once you go through the temple for the first time, this is usually right before you either serve a mission or get married, you are given special clothing to wear to help you remember the promices that you have made in the temple. We refer to them as garments, usually, although the official name is "garments of the holy priesthood." We wear them under our clothes and they consist of what looks like a tee shirt (or more of a baby-tee for women) and shorts (or more like boxers for men.)
We always keep them covered because they are sacred and personal. They are not "full body" undies, as many of you have seen me wear baby tees and knee length skirts. I assure you that I was wearing them, because I always do. They don't get stinky because you can buy as many pairs as you want, and it is perfectly legit (and in fact expected) to throw them in your washing machine. They come in different cuts, sizes, fabrics, lots of options. It is also perfectly acceptable to take your garments off for activites that they are not appropriate for, such as swimming, water skiing, going to the beach, etc. We wear them whenever it is possible, but always keep them covered, and take them off entirly if we can't keep them covered.
They act in much the same way that the yarmulka, prayer belt, and black clothing can for traditional Jews, they remind us of our covenants and our convictions.
In additionn, without making light of something sacred, they do have other benefits:
1. I never have a panty line.
2. I never have a wedgie.
3. I don't need to wear a slip in most cases.
So there you go Manic Hispanic, the truth about "Mormon undies."
Please forgive me for spelling mistakes, blogger's spell check doesn't appear to be working.
"I heard mormons get a full body undergarment (we called them mormon undies in high school) after their mission. That one is suppsed to wear them at all times and if they show then the clothes you are wearing are not modest enough.
wouldn't they start to smell if you always wore them?
did you get a pair?
is this a load of horse hockey?"
Like all good myths, this one has its origins in truth, and so we must begin at the beginning.
So lets start out with a mini discusion of the word "sacred." Can anyone give me a defenition? Anyone? Yes, you in the wings and halo, thank you.
According to dictionary.com:
| 1. | devoted or dedicated to a deity or to some religious purpose; consecrated. |
| 2. | entitled to veneration or religious respect by association with divinity or divine things; holy. |
| 3. | pertaining to or connected with religion (opposed to secular or profane): sacred music; sacred books. |
| 4. | reverently dedicated to some person, purpose, or object: a morning hour sacred to study. |
| 5. | regarded with reverence: the sacred memory of a dead hero. |
| 6. | secured against violation, infringement, etc., as by reverence or sense of right: sacred oaths; sacred rights. |
| 7. | properly immune from violence, interference, etc., as a person or office. |
Yes, thank you, a very complete answer.
Now, I know what you are thinking, "Hello, Duchess, we know what the word sacred means, we are mostly college educated and aren't totally illerterate." I know, I know. I just wanted to be clear. I'm sure all of you also know that our society basically doesn't understand the concept of sacred, even if they can define it. Evidenced by the common question "Is nothing sacred anymore?"
And my answer, well yes, but only to those individuals who hold things sacred, and therefore, if you hold something sacred, you would be smart, and entirly appropriate to keep that thing protected and keep it within the sphere of others who also hold it sacred. Perhaps you may have read or heard the Biblical term for this, we are told to not "cast our pearls before swine." Now it's pretty clear why you wouldn't take a beautiful strand of pearls and throw them into a pig pen. It's not that there is anything wrong with the pig, it's just doing what pigs do. It wallows in mud, eats, sleeps, lives a good pigs life, but it wouldn't appreciate the pearls, and while it might find them momentarily interesting, it would not know what to do with them or how to care for them.
OK, so now that we know all about pearls and pigs, lets talk a little about LDS temples. If you live in the US you have likely seen an LDS temple. They are stunning and magnificent buildings with luxourious grounds. There is one here in Bellevue, if you haven't seen it, take a drive over, it's a beautiful building and the Duke's dad helped to build it when he was a baby.
You may have also seen our somewhat plain chapels, where we go to church on Sundays. We don't attend the temple on Sundays, they are open Tues-Sat, generally. So what do we do in the temples?
The temples are of the greatest importance to our religion. Inside of them is where we participate in ceremonies, (simple in nature, no puppies, no chickens, no wierdness) to seal our families together for eternity. For instance, the Duke and I were married in the Salt Lake City temple, but the ceremony contains no reference to "death do you part." Instead, you covenant with one another to form a marriage, a bond, a family that will last through eternity. We believe that families can remain intact in the following life, if certain criteria are met. In addition to sealing ceremonies we learn what those criteria are and how we are to meet them, then we make promices both to our families and to God that we will do those things. So the main thing that we do in the temples is learning.
We don't talk a lot about what we do in the temple because it is so sacred to us, as it deals with both our God and our families. It is also one of those experiences that you can't really understand until you've done it yourself, you know, like bungee jumping, so it's really pointless to talk about it with people who haven't experienced it.
So, that's all well and good, but we aren't able to go to the temple everyday, and usually not even once a week. There is not perscribed number of times you should go, but once a month is common. So, in the meantime, how do we remember the promices that we have made to God and to our spouces (and children.)
Humans have an uncanny ability to forget really important things. If this wasn't so, no husband would ever forget his anniversary. Some other case-in-points: people often forget, in the day to day grind, why they originally fell in love with thier partner. People forget to thank one another for all sorts of things. People forget how much they love their children.
And so, I finally get to the answer to the question. Once you go through the temple for the first time, this is usually right before you either serve a mission or get married, you are given special clothing to wear to help you remember the promices that you have made in the temple. We refer to them as garments, usually, although the official name is "garments of the holy priesthood." We wear them under our clothes and they consist of what looks like a tee shirt (or more of a baby-tee for women) and shorts (or more like boxers for men.)
We always keep them covered because they are sacred and personal. They are not "full body" undies, as many of you have seen me wear baby tees and knee length skirts. I assure you that I was wearing them, because I always do. They don't get stinky because you can buy as many pairs as you want, and it is perfectly legit (and in fact expected) to throw them in your washing machine. They come in different cuts, sizes, fabrics, lots of options. It is also perfectly acceptable to take your garments off for activites that they are not appropriate for, such as swimming, water skiing, going to the beach, etc. We wear them whenever it is possible, but always keep them covered, and take them off entirly if we can't keep them covered.
They act in much the same way that the yarmulka, prayer belt, and black clothing can for traditional Jews, they remind us of our covenants and our convictions.
In additionn, without making light of something sacred, they do have other benefits:
1. I never have a panty line.
2. I never have a wedgie.
3. I don't need to wear a slip in most cases.
So there you go Manic Hispanic, the truth about "Mormon undies."
Please forgive me for spelling mistakes, blogger's spell check doesn't appear to be working.
Monday, October 16, 2006
So Jesse has (via his darling, and my darling friend Kat) posed the question:
"Do you have a trampoline?"
No, I do not have a trampoline, nor have I ever had a trampoline.
Let me explain.
I wasn't raised Mormon, thus, no trampoline, and I have no children as of yet, thus, no trampoline. So, one might ask, what does that have to do with the price of tea in China. Well, nothing actually.
So I wrote recently about how we value children, there are a lot of children in Mormondom, and the chaos of raising multiple children is a common "issue" Mormon moms deal with. Enter the trampoline.
I have hear rumors that when children get to be a certain age you can buy them a trampoline and tell them that if they jump high enough, long enough, they will be able to jump up to Heaven.
Now, it's not that we actually believe such non-sense, but kids do, and if they are jumping continually on a trampoline, they are not running around driving their mothers' crazy.
They are, in a single known location, doing something physically active, that's only somewhat dangerous, perfectly legal, and may even be thinking about Heaven. (Though I personally am not convinced. I have taught children's Sunday School before. If they aren't thinking of Heaven in Sunday School. . .well I guess we'll invoke "benifit of the doubt" here.)
One might ask if it's moral to lead your child to believe such a thing. In my opinion it is very healthy to teach a child skepticism. They must learn it somehow. In fact, the LDS church expects it's members to question every gospel principle. We believe that every person must find out if things are true for themselves. I think the trampoline method is an excellent way to introduce this concept.
Now, things to add to my to do list:
1. start saving for a trampoline
2. find out from Mormon moms how young it too young to get kids started on this (do they have to be able to walk first?)
"Do you have a trampoline?"
No, I do not have a trampoline, nor have I ever had a trampoline.
Let me explain.
I wasn't raised Mormon, thus, no trampoline, and I have no children as of yet, thus, no trampoline. So, one might ask, what does that have to do with the price of tea in China. Well, nothing actually.
So I wrote recently about how we value children, there are a lot of children in Mormondom, and the chaos of raising multiple children is a common "issue" Mormon moms deal with. Enter the trampoline.
I have hear rumors that when children get to be a certain age you can buy them a trampoline and tell them that if they jump high enough, long enough, they will be able to jump up to Heaven.
Now, it's not that we actually believe such non-sense, but kids do, and if they are jumping continually on a trampoline, they are not running around driving their mothers' crazy.
They are, in a single known location, doing something physically active, that's only somewhat dangerous, perfectly legal, and may even be thinking about Heaven. (Though I personally am not convinced. I have taught children's Sunday School before. If they aren't thinking of Heaven in Sunday School. . .well I guess we'll invoke "benifit of the doubt" here.)
One might ask if it's moral to lead your child to believe such a thing. In my opinion it is very healthy to teach a child skepticism. They must learn it somehow. In fact, the LDS church expects it's members to question every gospel principle. We believe that every person must find out if things are true for themselves. I think the trampoline method is an excellent way to introduce this concept.
Now, things to add to my to do list:
1. start saving for a trampoline
2. find out from Mormon moms how young it too young to get kids started on this (do they have to be able to walk first?)
Sunday, October 15, 2006
It's Sunday.
It's Sunday and I wasn't able to go to church today.
That sucks.
Probably isn't appropriate to say "sucks" about something church related.
Well, that's what happens when you aren't able to go to church, you say things that aren't appropriate.
The Duke came home from church so cheerful that he was whistling. That's what I love about church. Does anyone ever come home from work, or school, or from doing errands so happy that they whistle? If you do, don't tell me, I won't like you.
Think of what we refer to our lives as:
The Rat Race
The Daily Grind
Survival of the Fittest
The Vicious Circle
It's a Jungle out There
And how do we deal with it?
One day at a time
Drowning our sorrows
As best we can
One foot in front of the other
So I go to church for three hours every week. I take the sacrament to remind myself that someone whom I have never met loved me enough to give his life for me. I listen to my friends share their thoughts on life, the gospel, and the scriptures. I participate in group discussions where I share my thoughts and feelings and learn from the other people in my ward. I sing along to and listen to uplifting and inspired music.
It's three hours every week. That's 1/56th of my week. How could I say no to spending 1/56th of my week doing something that will make me feel better about the world that we live in, that will help me understand who I am and why I'm here, that will sustain me and give me strength to get through the rest of the week.
I can't say no to that, and why would I want to?
So you see, I wasn't able to go to church today, so the rest of this week will probably suck.
It's Sunday and I wasn't able to go to church today.
That sucks.
Probably isn't appropriate to say "sucks" about something church related.
Well, that's what happens when you aren't able to go to church, you say things that aren't appropriate.
The Duke came home from church so cheerful that he was whistling. That's what I love about church. Does anyone ever come home from work, or school, or from doing errands so happy that they whistle? If you do, don't tell me, I won't like you.
Think of what we refer to our lives as:
The Rat Race
The Daily Grind
Survival of the Fittest
The Vicious Circle
It's a Jungle out There
And how do we deal with it?
One day at a time
Drowning our sorrows
As best we can
One foot in front of the other
So I go to church for three hours every week. I take the sacrament to remind myself that someone whom I have never met loved me enough to give his life for me. I listen to my friends share their thoughts on life, the gospel, and the scriptures. I participate in group discussions where I share my thoughts and feelings and learn from the other people in my ward. I sing along to and listen to uplifting and inspired music.
It's three hours every week. That's 1/56th of my week. How could I say no to spending 1/56th of my week doing something that will make me feel better about the world that we live in, that will help me understand who I am and why I'm here, that will sustain me and give me strength to get through the rest of the week.
I can't say no to that, and why would I want to?
So you see, I wasn't able to go to church today, so the rest of this week will probably suck.
Saturday, October 14, 2006
What would you do?
Let's say you built a beautiful house, custom everything, all the upgrades, in a lovely neighborhood. And when I say you built it, I mean YOU built it, not you hired someone to build it. You intended to live there the rest of your life, you have no intention of ever moving again, in fact this house, and the grounds are so amazing you intend to pass this estate onto your children and they to their grandchildren.
And then. . . the neighborhood starts to get run down, your neighbors start to move out leaving their older houses vacant. A few miles away a new neighborhood begins to be the "in" place to live, "anyone who is anyone" is moving there.
What would you do? Would you move too?
If you were a Mormon you might chose to take your cue from the LDS church.
The Salt Lake Temple in Salt Lake City is a symbol of the LDS faith recognized throughout the world. It is a magnificent structure, built over the course of 40 years by Mormon pioneers. Everything was done by hand, there were no power tools, the marble was quarried and hauled out of mountains, the designs in the marble were etched by hand, the woodwork was all chiseled by hand, the murals that cover the walls are all hand painted originals, the gardens win national awards year after year.
The building itself is a treasure of American History, so when Downtown Salt Lake City started to get a little dusty and deserted, the church administration decided to do something about it. And when I say something I mean SOMETHING.
It was announced at general conference two weeks ago and this week's Church News (isn't it cool that we have our own weekly newspaper?) gave the details. I for one can't wait to see it- maybe I'll even consider visiting by 2011. (I'm kidding mom, maybe 2009.)
You can read what they are planning here.
So, why did I write about this?
I think we all have an opportunity to make the place that we are better. We all have limited resources of time and energy in this life. If I choose to put my time and energy into something, such as my house, my job, and my family, those things should become important to me. If things take a down turn, if my back yard is overgrown, if the business experiences a bad year, if my husband is too busy for me, it would be easy to close the blinds, find a new job, or - well I can't even write it, but you get the idea. It's more difficult to say, this is important to me and I will be creative, I will put forth all I have to make this better, I will give MORE when more is what is needed. But in the end, if something is important enough for you to give your time and energy too, shouldn't it be important enough to "save" if needs be.
Now don't get me wrong, I quit a job once, but I only stayed there for 6 months before I knew it wasn't worth what I was giving it. I had to cut my losses and go. It just seems like our society is all about getting out, moving on, skipping town. I say, my life is important to me, I only get to live it once. I will live it in a way that I will want to defend, I will spend it in activities that are worth giving it to.
Let's say you built a beautiful house, custom everything, all the upgrades, in a lovely neighborhood. And when I say you built it, I mean YOU built it, not you hired someone to build it. You intended to live there the rest of your life, you have no intention of ever moving again, in fact this house, and the grounds are so amazing you intend to pass this estate onto your children and they to their grandchildren.
And then. . . the neighborhood starts to get run down, your neighbors start to move out leaving their older houses vacant. A few miles away a new neighborhood begins to be the "in" place to live, "anyone who is anyone" is moving there.
What would you do? Would you move too?
If you were a Mormon you might chose to take your cue from the LDS church.
The Salt Lake Temple in Salt Lake City is a symbol of the LDS faith recognized throughout the world. It is a magnificent structure, built over the course of 40 years by Mormon pioneers. Everything was done by hand, there were no power tools, the marble was quarried and hauled out of mountains, the designs in the marble were etched by hand, the woodwork was all chiseled by hand, the murals that cover the walls are all hand painted originals, the gardens win national awards year after year.
The building itself is a treasure of American History, so when Downtown Salt Lake City started to get a little dusty and deserted, the church administration decided to do something about it. And when I say something I mean SOMETHING.
It was announced at general conference two weeks ago and this week's Church News (isn't it cool that we have our own weekly newspaper?) gave the details. I for one can't wait to see it- maybe I'll even consider visiting by 2011. (I'm kidding mom, maybe 2009.)
You can read what they are planning here.
So, why did I write about this?
I think we all have an opportunity to make the place that we are better. We all have limited resources of time and energy in this life. If I choose to put my time and energy into something, such as my house, my job, and my family, those things should become important to me. If things take a down turn, if my back yard is overgrown, if the business experiences a bad year, if my husband is too busy for me, it would be easy to close the blinds, find a new job, or - well I can't even write it, but you get the idea. It's more difficult to say, this is important to me and I will be creative, I will put forth all I have to make this better, I will give MORE when more is what is needed. But in the end, if something is important enough for you to give your time and energy too, shouldn't it be important enough to "save" if needs be.
Now don't get me wrong, I quit a job once, but I only stayed there for 6 months before I knew it wasn't worth what I was giving it. I had to cut my losses and go. It just seems like our society is all about getting out, moving on, skipping town. I say, my life is important to me, I only get to live it once. I will live it in a way that I will want to defend, I will spend it in activities that are worth giving it to.
Thursday, October 12, 2006
Some of the questions that I have been asked as of late, and a generally good place to keep track of the topics I would like to write about.
If you have a question, leave a comment, I'll consider it.
-No alcohol, ever? Never ever? How? WHAT! no coffee either, and you live in SEATTLE?
-What on earth would posses you to go live in the Jungle for two years?
-What's with the "I don't do that on Sunday" thing?
-Three hours? Seriously, three hours in one day, every week?
-Do you REALLY kill puppies in those temples of yours? (seriously, read this on the internet a few days ago. -- and NO -- what is wrong with people!)
OK, that's a good start for now.
What do YOU want to know?
If you have a question, leave a comment, I'll consider it.
-No alcohol, ever? Never ever? How? WHAT! no coffee either, and you live in SEATTLE?
-What on earth would posses you to go live in the Jungle for two years?
-What's with the "I don't do that on Sunday" thing?
-Three hours? Seriously, three hours in one day, every week?
-Do you REALLY kill puppies in those temples of yours? (seriously, read this on the internet a few days ago. -- and NO -- what is wrong with people!)
OK, that's a good start for now.
What do YOU want to know?
As if I don't have enough to do.
And so begins this, my newest blog.
I keep another blog, all about my knitting adventures, as well as life in general, but the people that read it, read it for knitting content, not my religious beliefs. That said, I really felt I needed a place to address the adventures and misadventures of being a Mormon in Seattle.
Here is how it all began
A few days ago I was in a public place. I was standing outside of a room full of women who I am vaguely acquainted with, the door was open. This is what I hear. . .
loud laughter
"And I said, what are you a MORMON or something? Quit wasting my time."
more loud laughter
I didn't stick around to hear any more of the conversation. It didn't really matter to me what it was about, anyway.
I walked down a flight of stairs and commented to a friend (who knows my religious affiliation) about what I had just heard. Her response:
Well, it is a pretty common punch line.
Was that supposed to make me feel better? I wasn't feeling terribly well that day, so I told myself that I was likely being too sensitive and I just needed to go home and sleep, so I did. When I woke up I remembered, and the next day, I remembered again, and the next day, and today I decided I MUST VENT!
I was wondering if that line has been changed if people would think it less funny, less appropriate. . .
"What are you JEWISH or something?"
"What are you a MEXICAN or something?"
"What are you GAY or something?"
I certainly would not say any of those things.
Then, last night, as I'm sitting here in my living room, being sick, and watching reruns of That 70's Show (which I find hysterical,) Red Forman asks why all these kids go everywhere with him and proclaims,
"I feel like a damned Mormon."
Now that I found funny, very funny. Why? That is what I asked myself.
My answer, because it's true. Mormon families often have several kids, I plan on having about 3 of my own, and if my husband has his way, it will be more. We value family, we value children, and yes, it causes havoc and chaos sometimes. THAT'S why it's funny.
So why was the woman's comment not funny to me? Well, I didn't know the context, but it was the way that she said it for one. It was devaluing something I hold dearly, it wasn't pointing out an unusual quirk. What ever the person did or said that prompted her to make the comment was "wasting her time." Are my core values and beliefs a waste of time? No, no they are not.
I'm sure (OK, not sure, I hope) that this woman didn't realize that what she said was inappropriate. However, it does point out to me that she is ill informed and ill educated. Even if it wasn't intentionally prejudicial, it was ignorant.
And so, what do I do about it? I write. I write about what it means to me to be LDS, why I believe what I do, and how I came to believe it. I write about how I act the way I do, and why. I write about the comical, and not so comical aspects of being a Mormon, and hope that maybe one or two people will be better informed, better educated on what it means to be a Mormon.
That is, what it means other than being the unappreciating punchline to poorly conceived humor.
And so begins this, my newest blog.
I keep another blog, all about my knitting adventures, as well as life in general, but the people that read it, read it for knitting content, not my religious beliefs. That said, I really felt I needed a place to address the adventures and misadventures of being a Mormon in Seattle.
Here is how it all began
A few days ago I was in a public place. I was standing outside of a room full of women who I am vaguely acquainted with, the door was open. This is what I hear. . .
loud laughter
"And I said, what are you a MORMON or something? Quit wasting my time."
more loud laughter
I didn't stick around to hear any more of the conversation. It didn't really matter to me what it was about, anyway.
I walked down a flight of stairs and commented to a friend (who knows my religious affiliation) about what I had just heard. Her response:
Well, it is a pretty common punch line.
Was that supposed to make me feel better? I wasn't feeling terribly well that day, so I told myself that I was likely being too sensitive and I just needed to go home and sleep, so I did. When I woke up I remembered, and the next day, I remembered again, and the next day, and today I decided I MUST VENT!
I was wondering if that line has been changed if people would think it less funny, less appropriate. . .
"What are you JEWISH or something?"
"What are you a MEXICAN or something?"
"What are you GAY or something?"
I certainly would not say any of those things.
Then, last night, as I'm sitting here in my living room, being sick, and watching reruns of That 70's Show (which I find hysterical,) Red Forman asks why all these kids go everywhere with him and proclaims,
"I feel like a damned Mormon."
Now that I found funny, very funny. Why? That is what I asked myself.
My answer, because it's true. Mormon families often have several kids, I plan on having about 3 of my own, and if my husband has his way, it will be more. We value family, we value children, and yes, it causes havoc and chaos sometimes. THAT'S why it's funny.
So why was the woman's comment not funny to me? Well, I didn't know the context, but it was the way that she said it for one. It was devaluing something I hold dearly, it wasn't pointing out an unusual quirk. What ever the person did or said that prompted her to make the comment was "wasting her time." Are my core values and beliefs a waste of time? No, no they are not.
I'm sure (OK, not sure, I hope) that this woman didn't realize that what she said was inappropriate. However, it does point out to me that she is ill informed and ill educated. Even if it wasn't intentionally prejudicial, it was ignorant.
And so, what do I do about it? I write. I write about what it means to me to be LDS, why I believe what I do, and how I came to believe it. I write about how I act the way I do, and why. I write about the comical, and not so comical aspects of being a Mormon, and hope that maybe one or two people will be better informed, better educated on what it means to be a Mormon.
That is, what it means other than being the unappreciating punchline to poorly conceived humor.
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